Hi All
Just come back from The RBS Caledonian Challenge where I was working as a medic at one of the checkpoints and I feel the need to have a rant at midges.
DAMN THINGS, Damn them all to hell and back, If I wasn't so good natured I would personally hunt down each and every one of those little sods and pull their wings off, then their legs, then perform unneccesary surgery on them with a blunt spoon and no anasthetic, and I would laugh while doing so, in full view of their friends, who would be caged up, unable to escape whilst being taunted by badgers. AND THEN I would take all the little bits and boil them, boil them all up into one great big pan of midgie stew, and purposefully burn it, out of spite. AND THEN I would take the burnt bits and lay them all out on a big parade square and dance gleefully on them wearing big boots and singing 'I Should Be So Lucky' by Kylie Minogue at the top of my voice. AND THEN I would take the dust and compress it into one big lump, and subject it to a lot of heat, probably with lasers or something, untill I get a rather fetching glass pebble type of thing AND THEN I would fire it into the nearest sun.
Rant over, for now
BTW That Nordic Summer stuff seems to work, repell midges AND gets funny comments down the pub. A lot of people swear by that 'Skin So Soft' stuff from Avon, that seemed to work too, but you don't get comments about the smell down the pub. Whereas I just swear at midges, a lot.
Bloody midges.......
Just come back from The RBS Caledonian Challenge where I was working as a medic at one of the checkpoints and I feel the need to have a rant at midges.
DAMN THINGS, Damn them all to hell and back, If I wasn't so good natured I would personally hunt down each and every one of those little sods and pull their wings off, then their legs, then perform unneccesary surgery on them with a blunt spoon and no anasthetic, and I would laugh while doing so, in full view of their friends, who would be caged up, unable to escape whilst being taunted by badgers. AND THEN I would take all the little bits and boil them, boil them all up into one great big pan of midgie stew, and purposefully burn it, out of spite. AND THEN I would take the burnt bits and lay them all out on a big parade square and dance gleefully on them wearing big boots and singing 'I Should Be So Lucky' by Kylie Minogue at the top of my voice. AND THEN I would take the dust and compress it into one big lump, and subject it to a lot of heat, probably with lasers or something, untill I get a rather fetching glass pebble type of thing AND THEN I would fire it into the nearest sun.
Rant over, for now
BTW That Nordic Summer stuff seems to work, repell midges AND gets funny comments down the pub. A lot of people swear by that 'Skin So Soft' stuff from Avon, that seemed to work too, but you don't get comments about the smell down the pub. Whereas I just swear at midges, a lot.
Bloody midges.......